Society for the Preservation of Polyesters

Hit List

  • RETIREES who shamelessly parade around the malls and boardwalks displaying their polyster garments. You can easily spot them in striped shorts and plaid or flowered shirts. Don't scorn them on your first encounter. Inform them of their sins.
  • DRY CLEANERS who continuely drown and scorch the memories of these slaughtered little creatures. Shame!
  • HOMEMAKERS whose polyester wardrobe has made it to the rag bin. Please let the polyesters lie in peace. Better to bury those rags, as before mentioned, then to use their memories as cleaning rags. You should live in filth!
  • YOU! You folks who haven't been sobbing your eyes out over this tragedy (or at least from laffing your ass off!)